


Petrichor

by Solar_Litost



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Angst with a Happy Ending, Aromantic Asexual Pidge | Katie Holt, Blood and Injury, Bullying, Canon Universe, Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Keith/Lance/Shiro (Voltron), Eventual Romance, Fanart, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Friends to Lovers, Hunk & Lance & Pidge | Katie Holt Friendship, Hurt Lance (Voltron), Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, Lance (Voltron) Angst, Lance (Voltron)-centric, M/M, Mind Meld, Miscommunication, Multi, Mutual Pining, Polyamory, Prophecy, Racism, Rape, Rape Recovery, Sarcastic Pidge | Katie Holt, Space Uncle Coran (Voltron), Team as Family, Temporary Character Death, Vomiting, now with art!
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-03-13 21:47:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28535403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Solar_Litost/pseuds/Solar_Litost
Summary: Petrichor (n): the smell of earth after rain.---Lance had always loved the rain. The smell, the feel, being lost in the moment, it was one of the things he missed most since coming to space. Three years later and Voltron was still at war with the Galra. Through battles, prophecies, and unrequited love, Lance will learn that even the rain can't wash away the pain that he thought he left back on Earth.
Relationships: Keith/Lance/Shiro (Voltron), Keith/Shiro (Voltron), Lance/Shiro (Voltron)
Comments: 47
Kudos: 84





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, 
> 
> I've been working on this piece since around September. There will be weekly updates and most of this is already written. I hope you guys enjoy. 
> 
> I want to be very clear about one thing. I do not write angst for shock value, I write certain things because more times than not I am trying to work through my own experiences and feelings. There is rape in this story. I will warn for it when it's time, so anyone who doesn't want to read it can skip it. I will always put trigger warnings. This story was something that wouldn't leave me alone until I sat down and wrote it. And I've learned recently that I don't need to go through my own pain alone. 
> 
> I am extremely grateful for this story and the people within this fandom who have helped me through my own trauma. 
> 
> Lyrics come from Neptune by Sleeping At Last. 
> 
> If you guys want here are my accounts:
> 
> [Tumblr](https://violetnebula.tumblr.com)  
> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/TheRoseHart)
> 
> This is beta-d by my wonderful best friend Judgmental Ghost, I love you and appreciate you! <3 <3 <3

“I'm only honest when it rains

An open book, with a torn-out page

And my inks run out

I wanna love you but I don't know how

I wanna love you.”

**∴**

Lance was confused. 

He wasn’t sure how he had gotten to this point in his life. 

Well, he knew how he had gotten into space and gained a lion robot and fought to end a war against a race of tyrannical aliens. 

Lance knew how _those_ things happened. 

He was more intelligent than people thought. 

No, Lance wondered how he ended up _here_. Shutting off his communicator, the sounds of his friend’s shouting halting as the connection was broken. He was laying on the wet ground, something akin to Earth’s rain beating down up on his face. The droplets a dark grey and larger in size than normal rain drops, his right hand clasped over his left side. Blood gushed, spilling over and between his naked fingers, staining him. 

Agony rolled off his body from the slice of a Galran blade that went too deep, tearing through organs he needed to live. _This_ is why they are supposed to wear their armor. But he took the risk, and if he hadn’t, they would have all died. He coughed wetly, blood bubbling up in his mouth as a humourless laugh left him. 

“I f-fucked up,” Lance mumbled, his lips trembling, face turning ashen as he stared up into a darkened sky. 

His cerulean eyes closed as he waited for the end. 

Because this was _it_. 

He had always known that he would probably die during the course of the war. Maybe going out in a fire fight or being cut down by the enemy, and he wasn’t wrong. 

That’s what happened. 

But a part of Lance, a fragmented and emotional part of him, hoped that he would die of old age, surrounded by loved ones. He knew he had a large family and knew that he wouldn’t be alone. But, it wasn’t so much a regret as it was something to mourn, not having found true love. It sounds so silly, but Lance wished someone would miss him. Not just his friends but someone, or even _someones_ that loved him, wholly and unconditionally. 

But he didn’t have that. 

And the piece of Lance that knew to look at the bigger picture didn’t care; he did the right thing in the end. He made the right call, even soaked to the bone in rain and blood… he knew it was worth his life. It was worth everything. 

And that’s all that mattered. 

Lance’s lips turned up into a small, soft smile as he faded from the world around him.

‘I saved them.’

* * *

**Six Months Earlier**

Lance came striding into breakfast after a perfect night of sleep. He listened to something Coran found for him on his headphones. It _almost_ sounded like the waves rolling against each other upon the shore in Cuba. Lance felt at peace and was able to be lulled into sleep without the suffocating homesickness that had been crashing over him lately.

And his dreams weren’t plagued by nightmares of Earth being destroyed and his family being murdered and all his friends dying. 

Among _other_ things… 

So, everything was great in Lance’s eyes. 

Until it came falling down. 

“Morning Lance!” Hunk said, handing him a sweet dish of something akin to waffles on Earth. 

“Thanks, man, did you sleep okay?” Lance asked, before sitting down at the table. They were the only ones up, which was unusual. Most of the time Keith and Shiro were the first to rise and Lance and Pidge were the last. 

“Yeah, but I think my back is still killing me from training yesterday. AND we have to do it all again today,” Hunk groaned, taking a seat next to Lance with his own food. 

Lance looked down at his right hand, fingers curling into a fist as he frowned. 

“You know, I used to hate training so much. I hated getting up early in the morning to do it. Hated the aches and pains and bruises and never feeling like we were getting any better. But, it’s important. We’ve been fighting for so long. And we are nowhere closer to winning this war.”

Hunk’s jaw dropped open slightly before frowning. He knew Lance too well, Lance knew that. Knew that Hunk could see that Lance was being serious and that his feelings for training had started to change. 

“Okay, who are you and what have you done with Lance?” Hunk joked, as he sat next to Lance, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. He gave it a strong, reassuring squeeze and he must have felt it when Lance’s body shook ever so slightly. 

Lance laughed and rubbed the back of his neck. He’d been training more at night, he didn’t know why he kept it a secret, he just _did_. He wanted to get stronger, not only with his bayard but in hand to hand as well. And he was improving. He was getting stronger and moving through the levels, albeit slowly, but any progress was good progress in Lance’s book. 

“Hilarious,” Lance grumbled, but there was no heat behind it. 

“But, no, really, I think it’s time to take things more seriously. I just don’t want to see anyone get hurt, and if I can do something about that by getting better, then I will. Plus… I would like to go home someday and that’s not gonna happen until we win the war.”

Hunk sighed and hugged Lance tighter. It wasn’t that he wasn’t happy that Lance wanted to grow and become better, it just wasn’t something expected out of the Red paladin and that threw Hunk off a little. That’s not to say that Hunk didn’t notice Lance’s hard work and natural talent. The only person actually oblivious to it was _Lance_. But Hunk did understand the sentiment of wanting to go home, he knew that Lance wanted that more than anything. Not to mention Lance still hadn’t seen anyone about— 

“Well ‘m still gonna hate training buddy, but you’re right. We can’t progress if we don’t start working harder. I think that’s really mature of you, Lance,” Hunk said, smiling at his best friend.

“Lance, mature? Shiro, pinch me I must still be dreaming.” Keith’s voice rang out into the room, his smug tone making Lance bristle. Keith sat across from Lance and started to grab some of the food that Hunk had placed in the middle of the table. 

“Aw, dreaming of me, Keith? And here I thought you didn’t care,” Lance smirked at the glare Keith shot at him before turning back to his breakfast.

Lance jolted when he heard a snort of laughter near his left ear. 

“Holy fuck!” Lance said, nearly jumping out of his skin at the close presence of Pidge, who he hadn’t heard come up behind him at all. Add that to the list of things he needs to work on in training. 

That’s gonna get him killed one day. 

“Bell… you need a bell!” Lance yelled. 

Pidge reached out and placed a hand on his forehead. 

“No fever, he _looks_ like Lance. But he could be a clone like Shiro was. Might have to run some tests,” Pidge said to the others. 

“Too soon,” Shiro objected, sitting next to Keith. 

“Shiro, that was over a _year_ ago,” Pidge said, frowning. 

“Too soon.” Shiro insisted in a tone that brokered no argument as they looked at Pidge, raising an eyebrow. 

“Lance actually brought up a really valid point about training harder. We’ve been out here for over three years now and this war isn’t any closer to being over. He’s right we need to work harder, even though I hate it. I SO hate it, like I would rather eat Kaltenecker _raw_ than train-” Hunk cut off as Lance gave an undignified squawk of horror. 

“Shiro!” Lance exclaimed.

“No one’s eating Kaltenecker,” Shiro said distractedly, focused on his food. 

“-But, like, I also don’t wanna die,” Hunk continued talking as if Lance hadn’t just had a mini heart attack. Hunk shoved another bite of food into his mouth and shrugged his shoulders. 

The table was quiet for a moment, tense almost, and then before anyone could say anything else on the topic, Allura and Coran entered and greeted everyone before diving into their own breakfast. 

They all talked amongst themselves, enjoying the banter and conversation before the work of the day began. 

And then shit hit the fan for Lance. 

Shiro got up and put his dishes away before heading to the training room, like he did every morning and reached out to touch Keith’s shoulder, squeezing it gently. Then he leaned down, without even thinking, and Keith leaned up as they met for a chaste kiss. 

In front of everyone. 

Shiro and Keith realized what had happened seconds after, both turned red and Shiro looked frozen. 

“Pfft. Finally,” Pidge said, as they took their bowl to the kitchen. 

“Yeah, was wondering when that was going to happen,” Hunk said thoughtfully. 

Allura and Coran weren’t even phased. 

But Lance was. 

Lance was so phased he felt like he was melting into the floor. 

He felt sick, his heart aching with each moment that passed. 

“What? When?” Lance’s voice sounded raw, like it wasn’t his own. He looked between Keith and Shiro who looked at each before shrugging as if to say 'fuck it.' 

“We’ve been together for a few months now. Sorry we didn’t tell any of you, we just didn’t know how you would take it. But apparently we were pretty transparent since almost all of you knew,” Shiro said, a small grin on his face. 

“Of course, Lance didn’t get it. He didn’t even know Pidge was a girl, so, real shocker there,” Keith laughed, before heading towards the kitchen. 

_Months._

A shudder ran through Lance’s body, making him feel weak and cold. 

They had been together for _months_. 

Lance was… devastated wasn’t a strong enough word for it. He’d been pining over Keith and Shiro for years, probably before he even realized it, and just never had the nerve to say anything. 

He was too late. 

But at the same time, honestly it was Lance’s fault. 

Thinking he had a shot at either of them. They were a perfect match, both in their personalities and how gorgeous they were. They fit together like pieces of a puzzle, interlocking and making up a larger picture. 

Lance didn’t realize his fingernails were digging so hard into his palm that he had almost broken the skin, forming little crescent marks. 

“Well, congrats guys! It’s nice that something good came out of being in space and war and shit. So, yeah,” Lance said awkwardly, before standing to take his own, still full plate, to the sink. 

Keith and Shiro just sort of _looked_ at him. Something unreadable on their faces. 

“Lance!” Hunk reprimanded, “you didn’t finish your breakfast!”

“I’m not that hungry, dude, chill. God you’re like my _mom_.” 

Hunk spluttered before following Lance into the kitchen, his normal smile wiped away to be replaced with worry. 

Lance needed to suck it up. For Keith and Shiro and the team. He couldn’t let this effect Voltron. 

After all, the greater good was more important than his broken heart. 

* * *

You know how someone said time heals all wounds?

Well, fuck that person. 

Time passed _achingly_ slow and with each day Lance felt like he was losing a part of himself.

He wasn’t eating nearly as much as he should, starting to become thinner, worn out. He was already pretty lanky, so he didn’t think anyone would notice. It wasn’t that he was doing it on _purpose_ he just wasn’t really that hungry much anymore. 

Besides, everything tasted like ash. 

* * *

The dark circles under his eyes, however, _were_ noticeable. 

But that wasn’t Lance’s fault.

He wasn’t sleeping too well and his nightly hour or so training turned into 3 hours and then 4 and soon he was there pretty much all night. 

It was horrifically unhealthy… but he was so upset over Keith and Shiro that it took up all his thoughts and caused him to toss and turn. 

Plus, it didn’t help that more often than not when he closed his eyes, he dreamed about _him_ and what happened at the Garrison. Lance thought he was over it. Lance thought he left all that pain behind when he left Earth. He was in the middle of an intergalactic _war_. He didn’t have time to be thinking about that shit. And to be honest a part of Lance just didn’t really want to acknowledge it. Only Hunk, Pidge, and the people involved knew what happened. And then they found Blue and his life changed. 

But clearly, some things still haunted Lance. Some things stain so bad they can never be salvaged. 

‘ _Dirty,_ ’ His mind would whisper late at night. 

And then he would practically sprint to the gym, working hard enough that his brain shut down. When Lance got like this he had a single minded, lethal focus.

He was on autopilot, relying on his muscle memory. A mantra ran through his head of,

 _‘Shoot_.’

 _‘Protect_.’

_‘Defend.’_

He went at a painstakingly slow pace, wondering why this was so difficult. He knew logically it was because each level got harder and harder. But he wanted to be better now, he wanted to be dependable and be able to protect his friends. 

Protect Keith and Shiro. 

He didn’t want to be the weak link on the team, and more often than not it felt like that was who he was deep down. Someone that was just in the way. 

A _weakness_. 

Lance finished dinner that night, something delicious Hunk worked painstakingly hard on that felt like cement as Lance tried to choke it down. He went to the training room bathrooms and found himself on his knees, heaving up his dinner. He would think about how shitty he was, how much of a waste he was, and he would think about _him_ , his hands and the aching pain, and would gag. He puked up everything in his stomach, dry heaving when there was nothing more to come up and he was left gasping. His hands were white knuckled on the sink as he stared at his reflection. 

He was disgusted by what he saw. 

He was trapped in his trauma, something he thought he left in the past. However, it seemed like, no matter how hard Lance tried, it had followed him into space. But his heart was the worst traitor of all… not letting him rest, pulling him between his current feelings and the fear that still ran through his veins. 

It made Lance furious. 

It made him feel weak and isolated. 

Lance was never someone that could be seen as hateful.

But he hated _him_. 

And most of all Lance hated himself. 

* * *

“Lance!” Shiro called, running to catch up with him as he headed to his room to toss and turn for an hour before training all night again. 

_Goddamn_ he was beautiful.

“Hey, Shiro, what’s up?”

Shiro stopped in front of him, frowning at him with concerned eyes. Lance felt himself caught for a moment, gazing at his leader’s lips. His own mouth went dry and he knew he was staring; knew he was looking for a little _too_ long for it to be normal. Shit, he needed to look away. He needed— 

“You’ve been looking a little worn-down lately, I just wanted to see if you were okay.”

“Oh yeah, I mean you know just some insomnia has been keeping me up. But it’s getting better, I promise,” Lance lied, trying to put Shiro at ease.

He hated when Shiro was worried. 

He had already been through so much and sometimes he wished the guy could just catch a break, maybe take a rest. He deserved it. 

But, once again, _war_ and all. 

Shiro’s eyes softened perceptibly. 

“Alright, but tell me if it gets worse. Coran can probably whip up something to help you sleep better. We need our sharpshooter in top condition,” Shiro said, a small tick up at the corner of his mouth. 

“Hey! I’m _always_ on top of my game.” 

Lance went to move back and put his hand on the wall, trying to play off being cool and when he slipped and nearly toppled over in his exhaustion. Shiro caught him around the middle and pulled up back into a standing position, steadying him with large, warm hands. 

“Lance,” Shiro said, shaking his head. 

“S-sorry! I’m gonna hit the sack, but I’ll let you know if it gets worse.” 

Shiro was too close now so Lance stumbled back before entering his room and locking the door behind him. 

He could still remember the heat of Shiro’s body that had just been so, so close to him a moment ago. He needed to be careful and keep his distance, in case his treacherous heart gave him away. 

“Fuck, I’m in so deep,” Lance moaned, running a shaking hand over his face. 

* * *

Lance had taken to spending some of his nights on the observatory deck when he didn’t feel like training. 

The observatory was a large, open, glass dome near the bridge that showed the stars spread out and glistening. There were a few couches and a pad on a type of podium near the center where Lance could open the star map if he wanted to see across the universe. More often than not Lance found himself spinning the map until it got to Earth. 

And he would just watch. 

Would stare at his home, sitting on the couch, his knees pulled up to his chest and hands wrapped around his legs. 

Sometimes, _sometimes_ he could fall asleep like that. 

It was blissful, no Galra, no worries about his past, just _home_. 

When he thought about Keith and Shiro and in these quiet, soft moments he wasn’t so brokenhearted, wasn’t full of sorrow knowing that he couldn’t have the one thing he had ever really wanted, no. No, in these moments he was glad they found each other. 

When it came out that they were together it was like hidden walls had come down. The team got to see more of Keith and Shiro and who they really were, without the steel infrastructure they had built around their hearts. They clearly felt safer to be themselves now and it was like a weight had been lifted and the rest of them could see their relationship and how much better they were looking because of it. 

They were getting closer and they were _happy_. The happiest Lance had ever seen them. And he loved that for them. Loved that Shiro looked like he was sleeping better, like he wasn’t having the terrible nightmares everyone pretended not to notice. Shiro seemed more carefree, instead of being so tense and rigid he was making _jokes_ and throwing down sarcasm with Pidge like it was the easiest thing in the world. And his _laughter_. Shiro’s laugh was like a symphony in Lance’s heart, and it made Lance swell with pride at how far Shiro had come. And Keith, well Keith smiled. Real and genuine smiles that made Lance’s breath catch when he happened to catch a glimpse of the shining light that was _Keith_ being _happy_. It was beautiful and free. Keith’s pretty eyes would light up, a deep violet that drew Lance in until he couldn’t even remember what he was saying, until he was just drowning in Keith, Keith, _Keith_ … And then Keith would start to openly laugh now and push at Shiro playfully when Shiro would lean down to whisper something in his ear. 

They were both so unrestrained and so over the moon for each other. 

How could Lance ever be mad at that? 

How could he begrudge his friends their happiness?

He could never be so selfish as to ruin that for them. 

As far as Lance was concerned his own happiness would always come last when it came to Keith and Shiro being happy. 

Lance was _okay_ with it.

He was lucky just to be catching the soft rays of light that reflected off of Keith and Shiro, lucky that he got to see the love they felt for each other. 

And with that Lance buried the secret spark in his heart for them a little deeper, and with it fragments of himself. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry for the delay, but here is chapter 2. 
> 
> THIS STORY NOW HAS BEAUTIFUL ART BY:
> 
> [Archive](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ErithEl)  
> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/ErithEl?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5Eauthor)  
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> -
> 
> She is an incredibly wonderful friend and an amazing incredible artist and writer! So definitely go check out her stories and art! <3
> 
> Beta-d by the AMAZING Judgmental Ghost, thank you for all your hard work! <3
> 
> TW: Blood
> 
> [Tumblr](https://violetnebula.tumblr.com)   
>  [Twitter](https://twitter.com/TheRoseHart)
> 
> ENJOY :)

Things shifted one morning during training.

Coran had pulled up walls in between each individual Paladin that shielded each other from view. This was something new they had started doing. They got their own space to work on their respective levels. It was meant to get more done at once instead of just group training. 

Lance was on it today; he had been doing so well. 

He finally hit level 30 and was up against three sentry bots at once. He kept shooting when the machine cylinders took to the air above him and he had to focus on them while downing the two sentries that were left. 

“Shit,” Lance muttered, he turned as fast as he could, but he couldn’t keep up and he was getting frustrated. At least he wasn’t going to fall through the floor, _again_ , but the downside was that he could get hurt. More motivation, at least that’s what Allura had said. 

“Lance, be careful, my boy, you don’t need to take unnecessary risks,” Coran’s voice sounded over the speakers in the room. 

“Yeah, yeah,” Lance grunted, as he finally downed the second bot just leaving one behind. 

He was still too slow with his rifle, he needed something else. 

_Anything else._

He took fire from the orbs, feeling his armor burn as it took the brunt of the hit for him. He knew there would be bruises, but he didn’t care. He was so close to level 31 he could taste it. 

Just as the sentry went to leap at him, he felt his bayard shift. 

No longer was he holding a rifle but a large sword, Lance was shocked. 

The creak of metal snapped him out of his stupor and he ran forward sliding to his knees and under the sentry as the blade swiftly cut it in two, from groin to head. He stilled on the ground briefly and swung his arm in a long stroke and took out the remaining cylinders in the air. 

He tried to take deep breaths to slow his panting and looked in wonder at the sword in his hand. 

“Whoa…” Lance said quietly in awe. 

“Level 30 complete, do you wish to engage level 31?” 

Before Lance could speak however a voice boomed out, “End training sequence!”

Lance’s lungs burned as he turned to look around. 

He froze as he realized the walls had been lowered and everyone was staring at him incredulously. 

“Holy shit,” Shiro said, eyes wide. 

“Shiro!” Pidge reprimanded teasingly.

“I’m with Shiro, what the hell Lance! That is so cool! You were almost toast and then BAM a huge ass sword! And you just sliced that bot right in half with some crazy Matrix move!” Hunk babbled, a huge, wide grin on his face. 

“It was incredible!” Allura said, even though she had no clue _what_ the Matrix was. 

“Lance, what level are you on?” Keith asked, frowning. 

“Uh… huh, I guess level 31 now,” Lance said, laughing lightly, a little embarrassed. He was probably so far behind the others. 

“Holy shit.”

“We get it, Shiro!” Keith snapped. 

“Dude, you’re higher than Keith right now, he’s on level 28,” Pidge said, with a Cheshire grin. Her eyes were moving fast between the two boys, like she was trying to solve a double modulation with barely any sleep. 

“No way, there’s _no_ way. I don’t believe it,” Keith scowled. 

Lance puffed up in annoyance. 

“Well, believe it, I’ve been working my ass off every damn night.” 

“What?” Shiro asked, perplexed. 

Then realization dawned on him. 

“That’s why you look exhausted all the time and aren’t sleeping?” Shiro asked, looking concerned and a little angry. 

“No, I can’t sleep in general, so I figure I might as well train. I told you I was more serious about it now.” 

Shiro seemed to lighten marginally at that, like he understood deeply what it was like to deal with sleep issues. 

Because well he _did._

“I don’t like that you’re not getting enough sleep… but that was really amazing. It’s clearly paying off, all the extra training,” Shiro praised, coming to clap him on the shoulder and beaming at him, “You’ve come so far, I’m really proud of you.” 

And Lance’s body felt warm instantly. That was better than winning the final level in Killbot Phantasm, than garlic knots, better than _anything_. Praise from Shiro. It did things to Lance and made him feel _worth something_. 

“If I was training double each day, I would be well beyond level 31, that’s for sure,” Keith mumbled.

“Keith.” Shiro reprimanded, the hand on Lance’s shoulder tightened minutely before he shrugged it off. 

“What?” Keith said, voice turning hard, there was something almost painful behind his eyes, but he pushed forward with harsh words, “He’s staying up all night risking _our_ lives and his own. What if he’s too tired one day and can’t pilot properly? What if we can’t form Voltron because he’s mentally wiped out?” 

The room went silent and Shiro looked disappointed. Lance felt like shit, he just had made Shiro praise him and now he looked like Lance really let him down. 

Hunk glared stepping forward to say something. 

‘What if he feels the same way?’ A quiet voice asked inside of Lance’s head, ‘What if he’s just as mad as Keith?’

Before Hunk could say anything, Keith had started in again. 

“He wasn’t even a fighter pilot on Earth,” Keith spit.

“What the fuck Keith—” Pidge hissed, but Lance cut them off. 

“Really, Keith? You’re being a jerk right now. We know you’re amazing all on your own with, like, no training. We all know Shiro is incredible and Hunk is super strong and Pidge and Allura are so fast… we know I’m the weak link. But that’s _why_ I was training so hard and I was really happy about my progress, I _know_ I’m just a cargo pilot. But I’m doing my best and I don’t know what more you want from me,” Lance trailed off softly. All the fight drained from him and in an instant he was backing up towards the doors to the training room. His bayard morphed back to its stasis state and Lance’s shoulders slumped. 

“I can’t do this right now.” Lance felt exhausted and small, did Keith really think so little of him? 

“Call me if we need to form Voltron, I’ll try not to screw that up too.” His eyes turned glassy, and his voice was tight from trying not to cry in front of everyone, especially Keith and Shiro. He needed to leave before he broke down. Lance turned and walked stiffly from the training deck, leaving his teammates behind him. 

Lance didn’t even stop when he heard someone yelling his name, he just continued down the halls until he got to his room. He tore through his door and wished in that moment he could slam it shut in anger. But he couldn’t so he sat on the bed and looked at the floor. 

Keith hated him. 

He thought that they were tentative friends at least. 

But he guessed he was wrong, because Keith didn’t treat him like a friend. He treated him like a hindrance, just someone in the way. 

Always in the way. 

It made his chest tight but Lance could do nothing but curl up on his bed. He felt tears sliding down his cheeks and wondered when the hurt would stop. 

* * *

A knock at his door came hours later. 

He didn’t want to answer it. 

He didn’t care that he was being immature. 

He felt well within his rights to not get up and open the door. 

Whoever it was knocked again. 

It was probably Hunk and Lance felt bad. Hunk hadn’t done anything wrong, so he sighed, got up, and wiped, uselessly at his face, his tears long since dried.

“Listen, Hunk, I just don’t want to talk right-”

Lance cut himself off when the door slid open revealing a frazzled Keith. 

“Can I come in?”

Lance waited a moment. 

He was a fucking _sucker_ for those pretty eyes. Even though he was furious and hurt; he was a complete fool and wouldn’t turn Keith away for anything. Especially not when Keith had shown up on his own. 

“Fine,” Lance said, giving in and moving to sit in his chair by his desk, staring at Keith as he stood in the middle of the room. 

This was the most uncomfortable Lance had seen Keith since he met him. 

“So… are you gonna talk or just stand there? Cause I’m really not up for company, especially from someone that hates me,” Lance said, trying to keep his tone even. 

That got a reaction from Keith. 

Just not the one he expected. 

“You think I hate you?” 

“Yeah… of course I do. Why would you say things like that if you didn’t? I know we aren’t close but like…” Lance trailed off rubbing one of his arms and biting his lip. 

Keith sat down on Lance’s bed and faced him fully. His eyes narrowed and pretty lips turned down as he surveyed Lance.

“I don’t hate you. That’s the furthest thing I feel for you.”

Lance’s eyes were wide with surprise as he stared at Keith, confused. 

“What?”

“Look, I’m not good with feelings and trying to express them. I literally am terrible at it, just ask Shiro,” Keith joked with a self-deprecating smile. 

“I didn’t mean to lash out at you. I’m upset because you’re staying up and not getting enough rest. We all know it. You walk around here like a ghost haunting the ship and you don’t eat enough, and you don’t sleep, and it makes us all worried. _I_ am worried. I don’t want you to get hurt out there because you’re not at your best. I just don’t know how to say things like this, so I act like a major ass. However, there is no excuse for what I did back in the training room. No excuse. But I am sorry and I really care about you, Lance, and I don’t want to lose you from my life.”

Silence. 

“Are you just saying this because you need me to help form Voltron, or—or do you really mean it?”

Keith smiled sadly and reached out to clasp a hand on top of Lance’s, squeezing gently.

“We had a bonding moment… I cradled you in my arms. Even if you don’t remember—”

“I remember.”

“What?” Keith breathed in shock. 

Lance sucked in a breath, his voice catching in his throat before turning his hand over to hold Keith’s.

“Of course I remember. I just, I didn’t know how I felt about us potentially being friends. So, I panicked and lied and said I didn’t remember.”

Keith’s eyes narrowed in frustration, like he was just about to figure something out about Lance and then he lost it again. He sighed instead and reached up with his other hand to cup Lance’s shoulder. 

“I should be pissed, but I’m glad you remember. I was scared we had lost you.”

Lance felt his face heat up and his eyes lowered to stare at Keith’s jaw. He couldn’t look him in the eyes in that moment. Couldn’t let how strongly his words affected him show on his face. 

“How about this, I’ll forgive you for the bonding moment situation and you forgive me for being a dick today?”

“Deal,” Lance agreed, as relief flowed through his limbs. 

Lance went to stand and looked down at Keith before a smile tugged at his mouth. 

“Dude, that is the most you have _ever_ said to me,” Lance said laughing, a real laugh and looking at Keith fondly. 

“You’re really a big softie, aren’t you?” Lance smirked, waggling his eyebrows. 

Keith reached out and shoved him, “Shut up.”

“Thanks man, it’s cool. I forgive you,” Lance says, grinning at Keith and Keith just smiled looking relieved, _happy,_ and his eyes softened. Lance feels his heart flutter and clench at that, he’s in so deep, he’s fucked and he knows it. 

Keith and Shiro are _literally_ gonna kill him. 

But Lance can do _this_ , he can keep his distance and just let them be happy. 

* * *

Lance was a lying liar who _lies_.

* * *

Lance almost let his feelings fuck up and alliance when they were hailed by a planet wishing to join the coalition. 

This sometimes happened but it wasn’t common. 

Usually Voltron would liberate a planet and they would negotiate with them to join the fight against the Galra. But this time Voltron had been invited to Fioros, a planet circling the Naris system. It had 4 moons that made the ruby red sand that covered the entire sphere glow. The makeup of the planet was similar to the deserts back on Earth with huge rock formations that had been carved in the shapes of some of the deities the inhabitants worshipped. 

The Fiori people were a fairly tall group of bipedal aliens, not unlike humans in size (some were tall like the Galra, but the smallest was about Lance’s height) but with sharp ears, red eyes, and their bodies made up of a thicker muscular structure.

The people of this planet were passionate and full of fire, never backing down from a fight and never leaving a death unavenged. 

However, the reason Voltron was called down to negotiate the Fiori joining in the coalition was because a new king that came into power a few years ago. He had decided it was time to move away from their old, violent ways and into a new era of peace. They wanted to help the rest of the universe achieve freedom.

Most of the people seemed to side with the new king, exhausted from years of fighting and bloodshed. But some did not share the same sentiment and created a faction within the capital city that was committed to preventing the king from making a deal with Voltron and joining the war. 

The rebels had been aggressive, destroying parts of the palace and infiltrating the police of the city and trying to gain support. 

People died during the raid on the castle and the king was grief stricken. 

Voltron wasn’t the downfall of the rebellion; however, it was Keith and Pidge.

Pidge had hacked their technological systems to find out when their next gathering would take place and Keith had gone in, under stealth, and captured the leader.

After the leader was taken the rest of the organization followed and some were offered amnesty while others were thrown into prison. The king seemed to have little sympathy for those that were involved in the killing of his people. 

Now the paladins and citizens of Fioros gathered to celebrate the alliance in the form of a huge banquet that took up the majority of the castle, rooms upon rooms filled with food and music and dancing. 

Lance loved shit like this.

But Lance was also exhausted, it had been a long day and with not getting much sleep lately and eating less he was worn out. 

They had insisted on clothing each of the paladins in full dress armor. The armor was a dark grey chest piece with a shoulder pad on the left side and a band on the right, silver glittering chains adorned the chest plate and hooked to the single straps on the biceps of the paladin. On top of the dark pants layered pieces of fabric connected to the chest plates. Each paladin had their own color. Keith a fiery red, Hunk a bright yellow, Pidge an emerald green, Allura a dark magenta, Shiro a white and grey tone, and Lance himself with a midnight blue. Each piece had lighter accents running along the side running parallel to the main color. 

Lance held a thin tall glass full of amber fizzing liquid, sipping it slowly as he eyed the room from the pillar he was leaning against. 

Allura was speaking to a dignitary that stood to the right of the throne (which the king had abandoned in order to dance with his people), Coran was talking to Hunk and pointing out several dishes, probably comparing them to delicacies that used to be a part of Altean cuisine, Pidge was weaving through the crowd, a large garnet looking crystal in her hands that started to give off sparks when she moved it in certain directions, and Keith and Shiro were sitting and talking at a table, their drinks lay forgotten in front of them as they were in deep conversation with each other. 

Lance was the closest to them, only a few yards away. But he desperately wanted to sit with them, be by their side, leaning in to whisper private things to them. Maybe gaining a smirk from Keith or a laugh from Shiro. 

But he wasn’t a part of them. This was their story… not his. And Lance was just a silent observer. 

He could watch though, he could turn the pages and read the words written of their lives and their love. But he could never be inked and curled over the paper, intertwining with them. Lance could be an astronomer staring religiously through his telescope to watch Keith and Shiro among the stars, magnified and brilliant, but still so far away. 

He could see the stars, but never touch them.

Lance sighed and tossed back the rest of his drink before setting it on one of the floating trays that levitated around the room. 

He knew he should go over to Hunk and Coran, join in the conversation. He knew he should push off from the marble and make his rounds throughout the room. Make himself known. But he didn’t, he couldn’t right now. He felt nothing but the heavy weight in his gut that hadn’t receded since seeing Shiro lean down to kiss Keith at breakfast that one morning. 

Lance felt like he was in a thick fog, with no way to pull himself out. 

Someone could put out their hand, lean down towards him and offer Lance warmth and safety… and Lance probably wouldn’t take it. Just let himself get swept away in the wisps of smoke. Away from any type of salvation. 

“I hate these things, Blue Paladin.”

Lance startled and looked to his left to see a Fiori leaning against the wall a few feet away from him. He was about a head taller than Lance and had some mean looking muscles. He was smirking, but it wasn’t like Keith’s smirk that set a fire in Lance’s belly. No, this one was cruel. 

“Yeah, actually I’m the Red Paladin. I know it’s confusing. These events aren’t so bad. I mean, it’s always good to unwind.” The guy looked familiar; Lance just couldn’t quite place him. 

“Yes. I’m sure saving the universe is exhausting. Parties, kissing ass, murdering people…” the man said, his gaze flinty as he turned towards Lance. 

“Excuse me?” Lance said, his voice had already been wary when speaking to the alien, but now he felt confused and also angry. 

“Don’t tell me you don’t know…” he said, before jerking his head towards Shiro who had stood up and turned towards Lance. Their eyes connected and Shiro went to tap Keith on the shoulder. They could both hear the conversation Lance was having with the guy in front of him. 

“Don’t know what?” Lance said, shortly. He felt his skin crawling, on edge with wherever this was going. 

“The Champion,” The man spit, like the word left a bad taste in his mouth. 

Lance’s body went rigid and he glanced at Shiro out of the corner of his eye. His hand was frozen on Keith’s shoulder, squeezing probably a little too hard and Keith’s whole body went quietly still. It was like they were both waiting for the fallout of this disastrous situation.

“His name is Shiro. And I don’t know what your issue is but maybe you should go cool off,” Lance snapped, his voice hard and unwavering, a burning rage slowly building inside of him. He needed to walk away before he lost control of the situation… and himself. He was already emotionally compromised and not making good decisions. He needed to leave before this whole mess blew up in his face. He made to turn away from the man when he felt a large hand grip his left wrist and claws digging their way into his skin, tightening until he could feel his bones grind painfully. His body was whirled around close to the alien, pressed hard against the wall, the position forced Lance to look up into his crimson eyes. 

“Let go of me!” Lance hissed, trying to disengage his wrist from the alien’s strong hold. 

“You’re gonna defend a filthy, disgusting murderer?” 

Lance looked back in time to see Shiro’s pained, _hurt_ , expression and Keith shooting to his feet spinning around ready to take out whoever the fuck was talking about Shiro that way.

Shiro’s heartbroken face will haunt Lance until his last breath.

Lance saw _red_. 

“ _Fuck you_.”

He reached for his bayard and it activated into his sword, completely impractical but threatening all the same. He swung the sword up until the blade dug into the alien’s thick neck. It was pressed dangerously to his throat, not a warning but a promise. 

The guy’s claws dug deeper, warm blood sliding down Lance’s fingers to drip onto the pristine golden floor. 

Lance cried out as he felt his skin bleed and he tried to twist his arm away again. But he couldn’t disengage from the violent grip. He winced before glaring into the man’s face, never backing down as his body went hot with fury.

He was angry about being hurt, about the blood that dripped from his wrist. He was angry about the words the alien spoke. His aggressive behavior.

He was angry at the filth he spewed about Shiro.

How _dare_ he. How dare he talk about Shiro that way. Shiro who was sweet and brave and protective. Shiro who had horrific night terrors from the arena. Shiro who would die for anyone of them. 

Shiro who would _die_ to save the universe.

“You don’t know a thing about Shiro. He’s selfless and brave, and he would do _anything_ to protect all of us, including a worthless piece of shit like _you_. So, _fuck_ _off_. And let go of me!” Lance growled.

Suddenly Lance went from white hot to dark cold. Like he had ice in his veins as he started to feel his body shut down from all the exhaustion, the emotional drain that had been suffocating him for weeks. His breathing sped up and he felt himself losing some of the control he had over the sword, could feel it slip a little, cutting the alien’s throat slightly, a line of golden blood running down his neck. He felt tears prickle the corner of his eyes as he tried to escape from the hold he had and the whole situation itself. He could hear people yelling and shifting around behind him, but he couldn’t make out too much, the ringing that had started to build in his ears became so loud it was deafening. He could pick up a few phrases but that was about it. 

“ _Lance_!” 

“Jesus Christ.”

“ _Hermano_!”

He ignored every one. He was solely focused on the alien before him. Lance felt he could kill him in that moment. He couldn’ve. Lance had never felt like that before, so out of control. He wasn’t a killer, but something flared inside of him and no amount of logic could snuff out the feeling of pure protectiveness he felt for Shiro. 

“Ooooh touched a nerve, did I? What are you gonna do, little paladin? Kill me and become just as corrupted as the Champion? Then you’ll both _never_ be anything but killers with blood on your hands.”

Time was an illusion; Lance didn’t know how much had passed and everything seemed to move in slow motion. He could hear footsteps getting closer, but the sound flickered in and out like white noise. 

Lance pressed the blade in deeper, shaking, more blood spilling from the alien’s neck. And then he found his voice, shaky but relentless as he refused to back down from the alien.

“I remember you now. You were one of the rebels that received a full pardon. Tell me, how many of your own people were crushed to death beneath the bricks of the explosion you and your ‘cause’ set off? You’re a fucking hypocrite. You have no right to go around calling people murders. Look in the mirror.”

His hand lunged for Lance’s neck, effectively knocking the sword out of Lance’s hand and squeezing tight enough to block the flow of air. Lance felt himself lift a few inches off the ground as his vision started to blur. 

“What are you gonna do? Leave? You need us for the alliance. You need us to win the war. And you’re not even the leader, you have no say in what I do,” The alien sneered into Lance’s face. 

Lance choked out a ragged breath before he spoke, voice rasped, “If I walk out of h-here right now, my t-team _will_ follow me.”

That was the last thing Lance said before hands were on him, catching him when his feet hit the ground and the weight on neck was torn away. A group of Fiori’s swarmed the alien and pinned him down, cuffs going around his wrists. 

“The next time I see your Champion, I’ll kill him! I’ll fucking kill him! Just like he killed my brother in the arena!” 

Lance lunged forward but the hands on him gripped tighter and he was pulled back into a large chest and he felt others pressing in around him, blocking him from the whispers of the room. 

“Easy… easy, Lance. Come on, breathe for me,” Hunk said into his ear, trying to soothe him. He was vaguely aware that Shiro was holding him from behind, hands squeezing him like a lifeline. It just made him angrier, thinking of Shiro. 

Thinking of how _broken_ Shiro had looked. 

Lance felt like he was on fire, he was still bleeding, his throat was sore from being the abuse it took, and he was trying to pull air into his lungs, but nothing would come. He felt like he was gonna pass out.

Lance started to panic, trying to push the hands holding him away, he could feel the tears that had been pooling in his eyes finally fall, a river of grief sliding down his cheeks. Grief for Shiro, and all that he had lost when he had been abducted by the Galra. Grief for all of his friends being dragged into a war. Grief for the people he left behind and the people still around him. Grief for his own significant loss. And grief for the ache in his heart. An ache that he feared would never leave, the pain of unrequited love smothering him until the day that he died.

Lance feared it would haunt him.

But at the moment he wanted everyone to _get off._ He was too encircled; he was being touched too much… all the anger from the past incident evaporated into fear and tiredness. 

“Pl-please stop,” Lance begged, tugging his body weakly trying to escape the hands on him.

“Hermano, I know, I _know_ you don’t want to be touched, I’m sorry. But you’re in pain and you’re having a panic attack. We don’t want you to collapse. Take a few deep breaths, count with me one… two… three…” Lance tried to follow Hunk’s command

Lance’s vision was hazy, he could see violet eyes and the reflection off of a pair of glasses. He took a deep heaving breath and leaned back against Shiro, he closed his eyes and tried to focus. 

Finally, with the help of his team’s firm touch, their unwavering support, and holding him and speaking softly to him he was able to breathe easier and look around. It was just his friends, they weren’t gonna hurt him. They wouldn’t let anything bad happen to him. Lance took a deep painful breath and let it out. 

“On a scale of 1-10 how much did I just fuck up the alliance?” Lance croaked weakly, wincing as his wrist throbbed and his throat ached. 

“Don’t worry about that right now, let’s just get you back to the castle. You’re hurt,” Keith his voice was gentle, but his eyes were hard and concerned. 

“But-” Lance started quietly. He was cut off by Coran. 

“Allura is handling it, my boy, he was a rogue it wasn’t your fault.”

Lance nodded numbly but his legs felt weak, he reached out a hand towards Hunk to steady himself and felt Shiro wrap tightly around his waist helping to walk him out of the palace. 

He could hear them talking around him but all the exhaustion from months had finally caught up and he just allowed them to lead him to the castle ship while he stayed silent. 

He could hear someone laughing and Shiro’s hold got tight enough to leave bruises, but Lance didn’t complain. He just wanted to sleep, wanted to finally get some real _rest_.

The voices went in and out and he somehow found himself sitting on a bed in the medical bay. He finally had the wherewithal to look up at the people surrounding him. Pidge and Hunk were close by his right side and Shiro and Keith were in front of him while Coran was off to the left gathering medical supplies. 

Keith reached out and went to take Lance’s wrist gently in his hands, turning it over to see the damage as he frowned. 

“It’s deep… might need stitches. Or time in a healing pod,” Keith murmured quietly. 

Lance went rigid and his right hand shot out to grab at Pidge’s shoulder, a desperate look in his eyes. 

“I don’t think a pod will be necessary,” Pidge said, reaching up to hold Lance’s hand on her shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze. 

Coran looked down at his wrist and then at Lance’s face. 

“Yes, it’s not too bad. Might not even need stitches. We have this medical glue we got from Vexas that can close up the wounds within a matter of hours.” 

Lance visibly relaxed. 

While Hunk and Pidge didn’t look concerned at Lance’s silent exchange, Keith, Shiro, and Coran did. But before they could say anything Hunk started talking. 

“See? You’re gonna be okay. Just a few bruises. Lucky the guy didn’t break your wrist though, what a jerk.” 

“You don’t know the half of it,” Lance muttered darkly. He knew the others didn’t know what had really happened. But Keith and Shiro did. 

He knew they could hear everything, and it made him want to curl in on himself. What if he said something wrong? Or made Shiro feel worse? Or overstepped some kind of unseen boundary?

“Your neck will need to heal on its own, probably a week and it will start looking better,” Coran said. 

“What-what’s wrong with my neck??” Lance asked a little frantically, as he went to reach up to touch it, he hissed as he felt a sharp ache from the touch.

“You’re bruised, from where he choked you,” Pidge said. Her eyes were a little red but other than that she looked irate. 

“All’s well that ends well I guess.” Lance sighed, taking his hands from his neck and resting them curled in his lap. 

The others didn’t look too impressed but clearly, they were just glad he was okay. 

The doors to the medical bay opened and Allura stalked in looking livid. 

Lance immediately went to shrink closer to Hunk as Keith moved a hand to Lance’s knee in comfort. 

“What happened?!” Allura growled out, looking at Lance. 

Lance cleared his throat, thinking about how to potentially explain all the shit that just went down. But the idea of having to rehash everything just made him feel sick and weary. 

Did he mention he _really_ needed sleep?

“I’m sorry. If I messed up the alliance, I didn’t mean for that to happen. But I don’t regret it. And—and I’d do it again in a heartbeat,” Lance looked up and directly into Allura’s eyes. 

Allura’s eyes softened. 

“Lance, I’m not mad at _you_. I’m mad at that rebel! If you reacted like that, he must have done something, said something. You would only act like that if someone truly crossed a line. As it stands the rebel apparently was trying to get a rise out of you, or any of you really, in order to make Voltron look bad and for the king to back out of the alliance. However, it backfired because the king recognized him. He’s been arrested for treason.” 

“Good,” Lance breathed.

“Okay, yeah, but, like, I still don’t know what actually happened,” Hunk said, exasperatedly. 

Lance sighed and went to speak but Keith beat him to it. Shiro had been unnervingly quiet the whole time. Keith explained what had happened his eyes darkening with every word.

The air in the room was charged as everyone looked around at each other, eyes matching and completely in sync. In that moment everyone felt contempt for the alien and the shit he had said and done. Just the idea that Lance would even entertain the idea of killing someone… the disgust the team felt towards that Fiori was severe. 

“He could have killed you, Lance; it was scary. We were all frozen and then his hand was on your throat and everyone moved,” Keith whispered. 

“We aren’t mad at you, we just don’t ever want to lose you, no matter how noble the cause might be,” Allura said, moving in to pull Lance into a hug. Lance gently embraced her back. 

“I’m sorry, I’m just really tired. Haven’t been sleeping great lately,” Lance said standing up. He couldn’t look at Shiro… he didn’t want to see the disappointment, resentment in his eyes. Lance already felt bad enough he didn’t need the reminder that he fucked up again. 

“Wait, Lance, I still need to take care of your wrist,” Coran said, as he rummaged in one of the drawers to grab some supplies. 

“Actually, can you guys give us the room? And then you can come back in, Coran?” Shiro asked, but it was clearly a command and the rest of the team cleared out. Hunk pulled him into a warm hug before letting him go and walking out with the others. 

Keith hovered for a moment before turning back to Lance, his arms went around Lance’s waist and he pressed his face into his shoulder before whispering in a voice so low that only Lance heard, “ _Thank you_."

And then Keith was gone, releasing Lance as quickly as he had grabbed him. Lance had felt whiplash from Keith’s behavior. From the comforting words, the touching, and then a hug? It left Lance feeling warm but unsettled and confused, but before he had a chance to think that through, he had realized that he was now alone… with Shiro. 

Lance fidgeted, he still couldn’t look at Shiro, he settled for staring at his chest, moving to lean back against the bed he had previously been sitting on. 

“I’m sorry… I shouldn’t have let him get the best of me. I shouldn’t have attacked him. And I definitely shouldn’t have embarrassed Voltron the way I did. I know you can fight your own battles; you don’t need me to-”

Lance was abruptly cut off as he felt Shiro surging forward and pressing his whole body into Lance’s space. His arms came up around Lance’s shoulder, one hand cradling his head and Shiro held him close. The larger man was shaking, and Lance wasn’t sure if he was crying or if he was overwhelmed or what, but he just wanted Shiro to be okay. So, Lance brought his own arms up to wrap around Shiro’s waist, squeezing gently.

“Don’t ever apologize for what you did back there. I’m so proud of you. And I am grateful to have you in my life, to have someone like you have my back. Thank you, Lance, that meant so much to me.”

Lance’s face was wet… why was his face wet?

Oh, he was crying, crying into Shiro, while Shiro cried into Lance. 

This was a thing now apparently, the exhaustion finally won, and he emotionally crumpled into Shiro. Finally letting himself break down. The months of little to no sleep, slowly eating less and less, feeling so hollow… it finally came crashing down and Lance let it. 

Finally let himself cry, let it be catharsis for his pain. 

“The things he said, they w-were terrible. You’re none of the things he said. Sh-Shiro, I meant what I said about you,” Lance breath hitched and his hands tangled in the lower fabric of Shiro’s armor. 

Shiro pushed Lance closer into his body, it was like he was afraid if he let go Lance would just float away. The delicate chains clinked against each other, the sound echoing around the room. 

“Shh... it’s okay. I know you meant them, Lance. I trust you.”

Lance hid a watery smile into Shiro; his heart felt 10 times larger, felt warm and cared for. It felt like Shiro really cared about Lance.

Shiro _trusted_ Lance. 

“I trust you too, Shiro—with my life.” 

Lance had started to calm down, his stilted breaths evening out. He froze when he felt Shiro lean down and press a kiss into his hair. It was soft but there and then it was gone. Lance’s face flamed and he didn’t want to let go of the man in his arms. 

He wanted to hold on forever. 

But in life, all moments have to come to an end. 

Shiro released Lance and pulled back to look at him. Shiro’s eyes were red and wet and Lance was sure he looked worse, a complete mess, face on fire and eyes bloodshot. Shiro reached forward with his left hand and wiped something away from Lance’s cheek, just beneath his eye. A stray tear. Shiro’s hand cupped his face and then a pair of dry, but gentle lips pressed where the tear had been, holding for a second as Lance’s eyes fluttered shut. 

Lance was stunned, he was sure his mouth was hanging open dumbly but before he had a chance to voice what he was feeling Shiro’s brows furrowed and reached out with his fingers to brush along the bruises on Lance’s neck. Lance winced in pain, even from the gentle touch, the bruises ached. And Lance’s brain short-circuited. Lance shivered and his own trembling hand came up to cup Shiro’s. 

“It probably looks so ugly, like how weak I am. He got the better of me and I wasn’t strong enough.”

Lance tried to laugh it off like a joke, but his voice was flat and his eyes miserable. 

But Shiro wasn’t having it. He reached out and touched Lance’s chin, tilting it so Lance was forced to look up. He met Shiro’s gaze and saw nothing but sincerity. Lance’s eyes widened he could see his own blue reflected in a soft silver filigree. 

“It looks like courage.”

And yeah…

Yeah, Lance will take that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How's that for a bonding moment??? 
> 
> Huh??
> 
> GET IT?!
> 
> I'm hilarious (no I'm really not, ignore me XD)
> 
> To be fair the next chapter has a nice Klance bonding moment, so hopefully the soft sweet parts of this fill you with warmth <3

**Author's Note:**

> Beta Outtakes:
> 
> JG: I started correcting your tenses but gave up real fast. I can't tell where you want to be. You switch like every other sentence, sometimes during a sentence. It's just wild. 
> 
> Me: Stopppp I'm crying! There are treats in my eyes I'm laughing so hard!
> 
> JG: treats...
> 
> Me: I mean TEARS, there are TEARS in my eyes! Don't give up on my tenses. 
> 
> JG: I had to... it was too in TENSE.
> 
> Me: ...
> 
> JG: ...
> 
> Me: I hate you.
> 
> JG: Love you too!


End file.
